This was actually a nice read!
While I would probably not go for a \"dumb\" or feature phone at the moment (particularly for messaging; SMS is an insecure technology that needs to die already), the overall sentiment does resonate a lot with me.
I've read a bunch of insightful blogposts, articles and long-reads over the past few months about this topic. I did switch my habits a fair bit, especially after reading this post by amolith, which I also enjoyed a lot as well: https://secluded.site/pull-vs-push-intentional-notifications/
What I concluded for me personally is, that I want to be a lot less online to \"kill time\". This especially affects social media (in my case, that means the #fediverse) and doom-watching YouTube videos.
I intentionally selfhost an ActivityPub server that has few bells and whistles and is overall somewhat geared towards a slower feed (it's called #ktistec, check it out and leave some warm words for its developer!). I check in once a day or every other day. Still have some nice interactions and interesting thoughts to read, but nothing dragging me back every few minutes or notifications popping up constantly.
I enjoy reading interesting articles and blogposts and of course news about hobby interests, software developments & releases, discussions and A LOT about international, European and German politics. I use mostly #RSS for that. Again, this also follows the idea of \"pull, not push\". My preferred RSS client #miniflux just sits there and keeps collecting all my neatly compiled sources. And whenever I get around to it, I pull it up and start reading what's interesting and discard the rest. It does not notify me, it does not stress me: pull, not push.
Lastly, I started to use the Do Not Disturb mode of my phone and computer very liberally. Mostly on a timer during most of the day (during work and from 8PM until waking up), allowing only phone calls to get through and only from people in my contact list. I told family and friends to call me, when they need something from me immediately or for important issues. Messages on #signal can take several hours (sometimes days) until I see them.
This has gotten me in a better place, I think. Still, there are some \"left-over issus\" I am still unhappy about, such as YouTube/VOD consumption, which is still way more than I would like. And also the fact that i constantly have my phone on me and often times also in my hand, rarely even during conversations, which is horrible!
But I decided to not stress myself about that too much and work on minor changes in a consistent manner, as I have during the past months and years. It is all a process.
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